Fostering changes your life. Sometimes in big, sweeping ways — like seeing a child laugh for the first time in months. Other times, it’s quieter: an empty chair now filled at the dinner table, a birthday card from someone who once swore they’d never love again.

For Michelle Perry, Bespoke Fostering’s co-founder and registered manager, these are the moments that keep her going. “It’s not just about placements or policies,” she says. “It’s about belonging — for the children, and for the carers who open their homes to them.”

So what’s it really like to foster with Bespoke? Below, Michelle opens up about what new and transferring carers can expect, the kind of children they’ll support, and why this agency feels more like a family than a system.

Starting the conversation

It begins simply — with a chat. “That first conversation isn’t a test,” Michelle says. “It’s a chance to see where you’re at, what draws you to fostering, and what kind of support you might need. We’ll be honest about the process and realistic about what it involves, but it’s always a two-way thing.”

From there, the next steps are straightforward: an initial home visit, followed by a formal application and background checks. Applicants then complete Skills to Foster training, which covers everything from child development to safer caring and managing behaviour. “It’s three days that really open people’s eyes,” Michelle says. “By the end, most people say, ‘I get it now — I understand what these children need.’”

The full assessment takes around twelve weeks, though Bespoke works at the applicant’s pace. “We move as fast as they’re comfortable with,” Michelle adds. “For some, it’s a few months; for others, a little longer. What matters is that it feels right.”

Who can foster?

Bespoke welcomes people from every walk of life — single, married, same-sex couples, homeowners or renters. The only fixed requirement is a spare room and a stable environment.

“Some of our best carers are single people who once thought they couldn’t do it,” Michelle says. “It’s not about perfection. It’s about patience, empathy, and the ability to give a child a sense of safety they can rely on.”

Age isn’t a barrier, either. “We’ve got carers in their twenties and carers in their sixties,” she says. “If you’ve got the energy and heart for it, you’re the right age.”

What kind of children will you care for?

Bespoke looks after children and young people from across Norfolk and Suffolk, from toddlers to teenagers. Some have faced neglect, trauma, or multiple moves. Others need a calm place to rebuild trust.

“We do a lot of matching work before a child moves in,” Michelle explains. “We don’t rush it. We look carefully at what the child needs — their background, personality, culture, identity — and what the carer brings. When it’s right, everyone feels it.”

The agency also offers specialist placements, including:

  • Step-down from residential care for children ready to return to a family setting.
  • Parent and child placements where a young parent learns to care safely for their baby.
  • Solo placements for children who need extra supervision and one-to-one attention.

The Bespoke difference: no one left to cope alone

If you ask current carers what makes Bespoke stand out, you’ll hear one phrase again and again: They’re always there.

“Being a foster carer can be isolating,” Michelle says. “You’re handling school runs, health appointments, emotional ups and downs — and sometimes it’s three in the morning, and you just need to talk to someone. That’s why we make sure there’s always a real person on the other end of the phone, any time, day or night.”

Each carer has a dedicated supervising social worker who visits monthly, checks in weekly, and attends key meetings alongside them. Support groups bring carers together to share experiences and advice, while training keeps knowledge fresh and confidence high.

And when life gets messy, help doesn’t disappear. “If a child’s struggling at school, we’ll work with the teachers. If a placement wobbles, we’ll come out and sit with you. We’re not just a voice on the line. We turn up.”

A community that feels like family

The word “family” gets used a lot at Bespoke, but Michelle doesn’t mean it in a marketing sense. “I’ve worked in big organisations where you’re just a number,” she says. “I never want that here. I want our carers to feel seen and appreciated.”

That appreciation shows in small ways — a birthday card, a thank-you call after a tough week, or practical gestures like topping up an allowance so a carer can buy school uniforms or arrange a day out. “When carers go above and beyond, we notice,” Michelle says. “It’s our way of saying, ‘We see you, and it matters.’”

It’s the same with children. “We celebrate their birthdays, their achievements, their ordinary days. If a child’s turned ten and wants a leopard-print cake, I’ll buy the cake and bring the candles. Those moments stick.”

For carers who transfer from elsewhere

Many of Bespoke’s carers previously fostered with other agencies or local authorities. Some felt lost in the system; others just wanted a more personal connection.

Michelle understands why. “In big organisations, people can slip through the cracks. A carer can go weeks without a proper conversation or feel judged when they ask for help. That’s not fostering — that’s survival.”

Transferring to Bespoke is refreshingly simple. The team liaise with your current agency, handle the paperwork, and make sure there’s no gap in placements or payments. “We want people to feel that they’ve come home,” Michelle says. “And once they’re here, they see the difference straight away.”

Training that grows with you

Bespoke views training as an investment in both carers and children. “No one stops learning,” Michelle says. “Even the most experienced carers pick up new techniques and perspectives.”

Courses include safeguarding, first aid, equality and diversity, safer caring, and recording — alongside therapeutic workshops led by specialists. Topics range from attachment and trauma to managing school relationships and helping children regulate emotions.

“It’s not about sitting in a classroom,” Michelle explains. “It’s about real-life application — what works when you’re tired, when a child’s angry, when you’re not sure what to say next.”

Carers can also access reflective supervision sessions — a safe space to process challenges and celebrate progress. “Fostering takes emotional resilience,” Michelle says. “We make sure people have the tools and headspace to keep going.”

The emotional rewards

Fostering isn’t easy. It asks for patience, humour, and the ability to hold steady when things wobble. But the rewards are profound.

Michelle smiles when she recalls one review meeting for two young siblings, who arrived severely neglected — undernourished, withdrawn, their teeth in decay. Three months later, they ran into the room in matching school uniforms, hair neatly brushed, giggling.

“The reviewing officer saw their before-and-after photos and cried,” she says. “That’s the power of what our carers do — turning fear into safety, shame into confidence, chaos into calm.”

Moments like that, she says, “are why we exist.”

A shared vision

Looking ahead, Michelle hopes Bespoke will grow — but not at the cost of its closeness. “We’ll never lose the personal touch,” she says. “That’s our promise. Every carer will still know who to call. Every child will still be treated as an individual.”

Her vision is simple: to build a community of carers who feel supported, respected, and proud of what they do. “Fostering is hard work, but it’s also life-giving,” she says. “And if we can make that journey a little smoother — if carers feel valued and children feel loved — then we’ve done our job.”

Thinking about fostering?

Whether you’re brand new or already fostering elsewhere, Bespoke Fostering would love to hear from you. You’ll find a small, experienced team who care deeply about people — and who’ll be there every step of the way.

Call 01493 543197 or visit bespokefostering.co.uk to start the conversation.

When you foster with Bespoke, you’re not just changing a child’s life; you’re joining a family that has your back.